i wanna spread my wings and fly...

and i think it's about time.

6 years ago, an opportunity was laid in front of me, like a bonus, like a 'durian runtuh' which I had to reluctantly say no to. it was the hardest no ever. on one end was loyalty, on one end was familiarity. i stuck to loyalty. and was hoping i wouldnt have to serve loyalty for long. but i did. for 13 years and counting.

it was a difficult 13 years. had to go through lots of pain, lots of tears, lots of headache, because i simply had no one to turn to. i had to answer everything alone. it was initially so difficult, i would be practically crying every day. the pillar of strength was gone. there was no one to hug me and say it's ok. and i was so missing the hug that i felt like a lovelorn Juliet.

soon, tough became me and i became tougher. i learnt to survive. i learnt how to accept words into my right ear and let them go out through my left and never let them get stucked in my heart. i think that made me a strong person. and i learnt it the hard way. and im glad.

i wouldnt regret these 13 years. because without these 13 years, i wouldnt be what i am today. i wouldnt have learnt so many things with the little paper qualifications that i'm holding. and i wouldnt have gained all the experiences that i've enjoyed. if these 13 years have been tough, then, in the future, nothing is tough for me InshaAllah...

now im ready to spread my wings and fly. Allah has arranged this whole transition so well. Everything seems to be falling into place. and I hope that this will be an exciting new chapter in my life, InshaAllah.

of course there'll be differences. of course there'll be personal adjustments. but nothing is without changes. changes have to be made to achieve a better tomorrow. and i will thread the road happily and gleefully, hand in hand, along with the pillars of strength. words just cant describe how i've longed for this change. and finally, it comes as a beautifully arranged story-line and i hope for a happily ever after ending.

thank you Allah. for giving me this phase in life. i make du'a that this is a smooth transition for me. and may everything be nice and dandy and finally i will finally feel that im settled in to the place i always wanted to belong in. InshaAllah...

Alhamdulillah.

Ilal Liqaa'...!